Butter for the King...

There is a guy at work called Jon, but I have it stuck in my head that his name is James, as that's his surname and also the name of one of my cousins and, lets face it, my memory resembles a swiss cheese. Unfortunately, I call him James to his face - regularly.

It's become a bit of a standing joke, and the poor guy is very nice about it. Today for the umpteeth time I did it again, and after yelling at myself and startling him I started reciting 'James James Morrison Morrison', which is the first line of a poem by A. A. Milne - of Winnie the Pooh fame - called Disobedience.

One of my other, older workmates was damn impressed with my referential knowledge and recited the rest of the poem for us. Thus encouraged, out of the unfathomable recesses of my mind, I then proceeded to recite my favourite Milne poem for his edification, and to general bemusement all round.

Since it's stuck in my head, here it is for you too. I always make a big show out of the 'Oh Deary Me!' bits so try to imagine them in my voice accompanied by lots of over-acting... :D

The King's Breakfast
by A. A. Milne

The King asked
The Queen, and
The Queen asked
The Dairymaid:
"Could we have some butter for
The Royal slice of bread?"
The Queen asked the Dairymaid,
The Dairymaid
Said, "Certainly,
I'll go and tell the cow
Now
Before she goes to bed."

The Dairymaid
She curtsied,
And went and told
The Alderney:
"Don't forget the butter for
The Royal slice of bread."
The Alderney
Said sleepily:
"You'd better tell
His Majesty
That many people nowadays
Like marmalade
Instead."

The Dairymaid
Said, "Fancy!"
And went to
Her Majesty.
She curtsied to the Queen, and
She turned a little red:
"Excuse me,
Your Majesty,
For taking of
The liberty,
But marmalade is tasty, if
It's very
Thickly
Spread."

The Queen said
"Oh!:
And went to
His Majesty:
"Talking of the butter for
The royal slice of bread,
Many people
Think that
Marmalade
Is nicer.
Would you like to try a little
Marmalade
Instead?"

The King said,
"Bother!"
And then he said,
"Oh, deary me!"
The King sobbed, "Oh, deary me!"
And went back to bed.
"Nobody,"
He whimpered,
"Could call me
A fussy man;
I only want
A little bit
Of butter for
My bread!"

The Queen said,
"There, there!"
And went to
The Dairymaid.
The Dairymaid
Said, "There, there!"
And went to the shed.
The cow said,
"There, there!
I didn't really
Mean it;
Here's milk for his porringer,
And butter for his bread."

The Queen took
The butter
And brought it to
His Majesty;
The King said,
"Butter, eh?"
And bounced out of bed.
"Nobody," he said,
As he kissed her
Tenderly,
"Nobody," he said,
As he slid down the banisters,
"Nobody,
My darling,
Could call me
A fussy man -
BUT
I do like a little bit of butter to my bread!"